Relishing Your Being You: Solid Sense of Self

In the movie Runaway Bride, Julia Roberts' character Maggie loves being engaged but repeatedly runs away when about to tie the knot. It is obvious that she has a problem with commitment, but underlying that is the fact that she practically has no idea of what she really wants, not even how she wants her egg done. She has little sense of who she is.

The absence of this solid sense of self is at the root of a sundry of personal and interpersonal issues in both men and women.

We oftentimes find ourselves reacting or exasperated when we have to deal with individuals who change their opinions or decisions at the drop of a hat. Somehow we could not feel safe or secure with such people. The truth of the matter is that people who tend to be flaky are actually so because deep down they are neither feeling safe or secure. This is one indicator of having been wounded or traumatized in the early stage of infancy. The sense of self is shaky and one does not feel solidly grounded and may tend to desperately hold on to anything on hand.

For anyone to develop a solid sense of self one must be willing to activate hope in one's life and return to one's basic sense of goodness, worthiness and rightness. Affirmation of positive beliefs like "You are good being you" and "you are right being yourself" is a step toward the right direction. You can develop the habit of celebrating your uniqueness and fundamental value by honoring your true self daily.